So a month after initially posting about it, I finished Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter. Hey, I was on vacation, alright? So reading kind of took a back seat to packing, ticket watching, preparing for the insanely hot Texas heat, etc.
If you saw my last post, then you know the book was a source of amusement to me the second I bought it thanks to my older brother. Unfortunately the book itself isn’t a comedy, so there wasn’t much humor offered after the fact. That said, it is definitely an interesting piece of literature.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t find this awesome cover anywhere. Had to settle for the movie one.
It’s a very new, unique (to me. If you know other books like it, feel free to let me know!) take on the former President’s life. While the book is obviously fictional it does have grains of truth woven through it. A lot of the truth revolves around Lincoln’s personal life, and it was a hell of a lot more fascinating to read than any history text I’ve ever had to try to make it through. Unfortunately I somehow made it through most of my schooling without realizing just how depressing and dark Lincoln’s life was. Some parts I found myself glued to the page because I was half-hoping somebody would pull through and live to watch a young Abe become President, or at the very least a political figure. You just find yourself rooting for Abe and those in his life—the author deserves some credit for that one. Usually there’s at least one character who’s supposed to be good that I want to punch in the face; not so for this. The evil guys, yeah, I want to punch them in the face, but most of them are vampires and a punch in the fact would result in a broken hand for me.
So… much… sadness…
And the vampires! I’m happy to say these are honest-to-God blood-sucking, pale, able to die from stakes and fire vampires. And here I thought the world of the written word forgot what they were actually like. Sure there were some creative tweaks here and there, such as some of them being human sympathizers and being able to go in the sun as long as they were shielded, but they worked. Nothing seemed too farfetched and at the risk of sounding totally nuts, it made it seem like it really was possible that vampires lived among our ancestors. The main vampire in the book was also my favorite character: Henry Sturges. I just wish he had gotten more focus. Henry, by the way, was sort of Abe’s vampire-mentor, who doubled as a list-keeper for those of his own kind who should be murdered.
Mr. Sturges is also very easy on the eyes.
I don’t really want to get into the politics of the book on here. Unforunately Abe’s political life does tie-in to his vampire hunting, but it can be such a touchy subject. I will say this much: never did I think I would read about somebody connecting vampires, slavery, and politics without saying something like “Politicians are vampires” or “The government is making slaves of us all!”
Just a joke people, just a joke.
Oh, and the ending. Ohh, so good! I really think you should just read it, so I’ll try to entice you into it: Wilkes-Booth a vampire, failed murders, Sturges being a bad@ss vamp, funeral information, more Sturges, Martin Luther King Jr. being watched by Sturges and a, ahem, *tall* friend.
Overall, it’s a good read. While I can understand why some people may not like it, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. The only real complaint I have is that the style takes some getting used to. It’s sort of a weird cross between journal entries with Abe being the narrator and regular, 3rd person omniscient writing. I’ll admit, it was difficult for me to get used to this style and I almost put the book down for good because of it. So if any of you happen to find Seth Grahame-Smith, give him a nice slap in the face for me.
Rating: 9 out of 10 (sadly non-bloody) axes
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i thought about vampires